The next episode of The Chaos Project has arrived! Read it right here!
What exactly is a Lost Hex? Who are the Zeti really? What happened to them all? Why have they come back? And when did Espio become involved with them? On the hidden floating continent filled with mysteries, the truth will finally be revealed—and the war will finally come to an end.
Despite the unexpected second break, the story is still not dead! We’re already heading rapidly towards the end of the season, so have a look at one of the last “normal” episodes we’ll be seeing!
Daily Log, August 5th, 2 A.E. Amy Rose reporting.
According to the last communication we received from him, Sonic won’t be getting back here for another day or two. Things have been…almost eerily quiet since he left. It sounds like he knows something about that, too. I hate getting left behind…
I guess I should be saying that things were quiet. There are some rumors going around the Network about something odd happening in a few remote places around the world. Most recently, South Island. It sounds silly enough that we wouldn’t have thought much of it—if we didn’t have evidence of the Eggman Empire trying to cover it up. That’s always a bad sign. So I’m heading out with Hero and Bruno to investigate.
Just for fun, I did a tarot reading. “What should I be aware of for this journey?” I got Number XXI—The World. Reversed. The World represents…completeness, or unity. So reversed, it would be something incomplete…a lack of closure…maybe something that was…forgotten before, needs to be remembered again? Or maybe it shouldn’t be…?
After everything that happened on the Little Planet, I believe it more than ever. I’ll be watching for this incomplete world.
—–—
Bridge Zone—South Island
“All we’re saying,” Bruno babbles, “is that if the mustache was real, wouldn’t we be seeing some sign of that? He never grows it any longer, he never trims it any shorter, not even from day to day. But his eyebrows? Hair on his head? Nothing. So maybe Eggman doesn’t have any hair at all. His mustache doesn’t grow, because it can’t grow, because he doesn’t have a mustache!”
Amy giggles at the notion. “Is he really speaking for you here? Do you honestly believe that?”
Hero shrugs.
Bruno picks up, “He’s being modest as usual. Wisps don’t even have hair, I have no idea what I’m talking about. Just relaying the hotdog.”
Amy raises an eyebrow.
“Message. I meant, message. I swear, this translator keeps getting…hex.”
“Hex… Curse… You meant to say, worse?”
“Nope. Hex. Definitely hex.” Hero and Bruno both stare out in shock over the cliff they’ve arrived at. Amy turns to follow their gaze. It’s no ordinary cliff. It cuts a perfectly clean line through the grass in front of them, stretching off at least a mile in each direction before taking a perfectly angled turn away. The impossibly straight cliffs meet back together far on the opposite side ahead of them, creating an open pit in the mathematically precise shape of a hexagon.
Amy’s own shock finally wears off enough for her to speak. “It’s just like the rumors said. Miles and miles of land just…gone.”
What could Amy’s cards have been predicting? And what could have happened to the Bridge Zone? Find out all this and more on the next episode of The Chaos Project, coming soon!
[Mr. C]: (offscreen) It’s not even April 1st anymore, Blacklight. What are you still doing here?
[Blacklight]: Wouldn’t the world be a better place if every day were April Fool’s Day?
[Shadow]: No. No it would not.
[Blacklight]: Your lousy opinions aside, I have no intention of leaving my fans hanging. So let’s get started, shall we? Shadow, the first question, if you would.
[Shadow]: Whatever… Getting in before this years takeover even started, chopinthehedgehog says in response to the first year’s Villain Chat! with Shadow the Hedgehog: “Hi Shadow. I’m a new fan in this franchise. You’re my favorite. But I just want to say, I don’t think you’re a villain. That’s just me.. I don’t like heavy metal that much either.”
[Blacklight]: I told you to read the questions from my fans, not yours.
[Shadow]: It’s all the same… Whatever. Regardless, welcome to the franchise, chopin. The support of my fans is appreciated. But you should know, I’ve reassessed my opinion on heavy metal since hearing the new soundtrack of Sonic Frontiers. Kellin Quinn is an excellent performer.
[Blacklight]: Did you just admit that you like one of Sonic’s theme songs better than your own?
[Shadow]: Three of them, actually. “Undefeatable”, “Break Through it All”, and “Find Your Flame” are all superior to “Almost Dead” in every conceivable way. I’m not conceited enough to deny the facts.
[Blacklight]: You heard it here first, folks. Shadow isn’t conceited, apparently. Let’s move on.
[Shadow] *takes a deep breath* “Crystal the Hedgehog” asks, “OOOOOOOOOOOOF! SONIC DIES?! OOOOOOOUCH! But that game look very interesting. Are you going to include any of your fan characters?”
[Blacklight]: Wow, Shadow. I didn’t know you were capable of expressing that much emotion. Too bad this is only a transcript that no one else can hear.
[Shadow]: She also asks, “Is the game already released? I don’t want to watch this to spoil everything about the game. … Or is it just for a video?”
[Blacklight]: Well, I have some bad news and some good news for our friends here. Bad news is, I think there might have been a little misunderstanding. We didn’t make this game. It’s a semi-official product headed by the official Sonic social media team. That also means you won’t be seeing any Chaos Project characters in there, unless we figure out how to mod it for next year. The good news is, yes! It’s out! Free for everyone on PC from Steam. It even works on my old dinosaur of a machine.
[Mr. C]: (offscreen) Here’s the download page. https://store.steampowered.com/app/2324650/The_Murder_of_Sonic_the_Hedgehog/ Sounds like it might be available for a limited time though, so get it while it’s there!
[Blacklight]: And when you’re done playing it, make sure you come back for my commentary highlights with Shadow. We worked hard so you could hear our voices together for the first time.
[Shadow]: Don’t bother watching his full playthrough. It doesn’t have our voices.
[Blacklight]: Well, I mean, they can watch it if they want to… How about the next question?
[Shadow]: Also from “Crystal”. “What do think Ashura the Glitch is? A transformation of Sonic? Or an actual hedgehog?”
[Blacklight]: Ooh, I like talking about glitches. This one, right?
[Shadow]: The result of a pallet swap error in Sonic the Hedgehog 2. Sonic is supposed to share colors with the waterfall sprites, so if waterfalls end up where they’re not supposed to be, they can modify Sonic’s colors in unintended ways.
[Blacklight]: Oh come on, that’s the boring answer! Where’s your creativity? It’s obvious to me that this “Ashura” person is a malignant spirit of the waterfall that possesses Sonic’s body as vengeance for the waterfalls being moved out of place.
[Shadow]: And I suppose Sonic ’06 is the result of a malignant spirit as well?
[Blacklight]: Well yeah. His name’s Murphy.
[Shadow]: You mean Mephiles?
[Blacklight]: Sure, whatever.
[Shadow]: Well, if you want to look at Ashura as a character, the Sonic IDW comics have recently provided us with an alternative explanation.
[Shadow]: This character is called Surge the Tenrec. Her design is confirmed to be based on the Ashura glitch, which could imply that, in terms of canon, the glitch was actually her appearing all those years ago. Her current character has no memory of her past, so it is plausible.
[Blacklight]: What do you know? You two are practically twinsies!
[Shadow]: … … …The next question is from “Ash the Hedgehog“. The question is, “Do any of you hedgehogs comb your quills? I need to know this. Do other hedgehogs care for the condition of their quills? Or just me?”
[Blacklight]: Well, I’m flattered that you think I just wake up like this, but it takes work to be this fabulous.
[Shadow]: I just wake up like this.
[Blacklight]: You see, I know that’s a lie, because a hedgehog without a comb gives us what we see in Sonic Boom. Your alternate universe counterpart really let himself go.
[Shadow]: … … …”Ash” has another question. “Also, where’s all of the parents? It’s understandable that Backlight and Shadow don’t have any, [along with Knuckles] but what about Sonic? Amy? CHARMY?”
[Blacklight]: Whoah there, I can’t go handing out spoilers for things that might happen in The Chaos Project. For example, we already got an episode all about the story of Tails’ relationship with his parents. Sonic dropped us a couple hints about his own parents in there as well—he claims he never knew them. Grew up all alone in the Green Hills with the Animal Friends as his only companions. Poor guy.
[Shadow]: I don’t tend to dig into people’s personal lives, but Charmy did leave us some hints as well in another episode. All he said was that when he met the Chaotix, he had no better home to go back to.
[Mr. C]: (offscreen) Blacklight and Shadow wouldn’t know much about this, but I believe the culture around “leaving the nest” is a bit different for animoids than it is for humans. Given that they tend to develop speed, strength, and coordination at a very young age, it makes sense that someone as young as Amy was when we first met her might have just recently been encouraged to go out on her own and start living her own life.
[Blacklight]: Makes sense to me. Next question?
[Shadow]: Back to “Crystal”. She asks, “What do you think about Sonic’s line in Sonic Prime? The line is, ‘YAAAAAAAAAAAWN. Yep. I yawned you Eggman.'”
[Blacklight]: Hilarious. 10/10 comedy.
[Shadow]: Awful. How does this even qualify as comedy?
[Mr. C]: (offscreen) I’m more with Shadow and Ash on this one. I suppose it’s worth a pity chuckle, pretty much on the level of “Baldy McNosehair.” Seeing that line in the trailer definitely worried me about the writing for the rest of the show. I like a Sonic who is sharp, witty, and carefree (when the situation doesn’t demand a darker tone). Nonsense insults like these not only lack the cleverness that Sonic should have, but also give the impression that he cares way too much about how people around him are reacting to what he’s saying, which is the opposite of carefree.
[Blacklight]: Y’all are wrong. It’s funny because it’s ironic. Yawning in response to an evil plot is expected of a carefree character, but then saying “yeah, I just did that,” shows that he’s practically reading MJ’s thoughts and predicting his obliviously surprised reaction. That’s not witty enough for you?
[Shadow]: Childish is what it is. Petty, even. He’s not trying to gain any actual advantage over his opponent, he’s just trying to him feel bad. A well-written Sonic would know that a hero should be better than that. In fact, everything about Sonic Prime so far feels like it’s meant to take place when Sonic was a bit younger, before he saw much of the world beyond Green Hill, and before he started to mature in the Adventure games. He acts like an excitable child. But it obviously can’t be that early, because Rouge and I are in that show, not to mention Orbot and Cubot. I don’t know what the director was thinking with that script…
[Blacklight]: Well I don’t think this argument is going anywhere.
[Shadow]: That was the last question.
[Blacklight]: Ah, well… I suppose I’m satisfied with my accomplishments this year.
[Shadow]: Blacklight, satisfied with something? That’s a new one.
[Blacklight]: What can I say? I found my voice, upstaged Team Rocket, and won over some new fans. What more can a guy ask for?
[Shadow]: A job?
[Blacklight]: Oh yeah. Boss?
[Mr. C]: (offscreen) No.
[Blacklight]: But even Team Rocket got a new business proposition after they got fired!
[Mr. C]: (offscreen) You have a voice too. Figure out what to do with it.
[Blacklight]: Fine, fine, maybe next year. But before we go, I’d like to extend my heartfelt thanks to chopinthehedgehog and friends for giving me something to do today. Oh, and for being awesome fans. Hope to see you next year! Some houses may burn if we don’t! Sayonara!
[Blacklight]: Well, it’s not as much as I was hoping for the world to see today, but I think it’s enough to give the fans the taste they’ve been clamoring for. Ask, and you shall receive! (In your face, Team Rocket! I can talk pretty words too.)
[Shadow]: They already heard your voice in Blacklight the Game, remember?
[Blacklight]: That wasn’t my voice. That was a voice actor. A lousy one at that.
[Shadow]: …
[Blacklight]: Stupid technology couldn’t keep up with me while I was playing this game… Didn’t even record my commentary…
[Shadow]: Audio bugs… Corrupted recording during the climax of the story… Did your computer seriously run out of space while you were recording this? Wow. You need an upgrade.
[Blacklight]: Well, Mr. suspicious locksmith, not all of us can afford fancy front-row concert tickets for so-called “friends” we don’t even like.
[Shadow]: Please don’t remind me about that concert…
[Blacklight]: Whatever. Just let the people watch the thing.
[Shadow]: Wow, you’re really bad at those running sections.
[Blacklight]: It is not my fault! Were you even watching!? Did you see how I kept phasing straight through those Ring capsules and landing on this spikes instead? The game’s programming is shoddy at best!
[Shadow]: You weren’t positioning yourself properly.
[Blacklight]: Whatever. Anyways, what do you say we review the game now?
[Shadow]: I approve of any game where I’m a main character.
[Blacklight]: Yeah, yeah. But can we talk about the false advertising here? I thought I would be murdering Sonic the Hedgehog! Booooo! I want a refund!
[Shadow]: It was a free game.
[Blacklight]:Yeah? Well, we’re making them money by advertising for them right now, so we should get that money!
[Shadow]: Pretending for a moment that it actually works that way, you’d be losing them money by leaving a negative review. You’re asking them to take that money back from you.
[Blacklight]: Oh… Well, I suppose it wasn’t all bad. I got to contemplate aggravated assault, conceal my war crimes, commit grand theft, and develop a crippling gambling addiction! All on the same train car!
[Shadow]: I was impressed at the level of depth, for an April Fool’s joke. The story won’t exactly be winning any awards, but it was more than just a surface-level mystery. The dialogue was…charming, I suppose. And the gameplay was surprisingly well balanced, building up to a stressful, challenging, and satisfying climax.
[Blacklight]: As far as comedy goes, these guys know what’s up. Considering what a loser the protagonist was, I was surprised how many times I was able to say, “That’s exactly how I would’ve responded!”
[Shadow]: Try not to read too deeply into that…
[Blacklight]: The artstyle was fantastic, the music was pretty good as well. All in all, 7.8/10 not enough violence.
[Shadow]: I know it’s a meme, but you could try using other numbers.
[Blacklight]: But why would I?
[Mr. C]: (offscreen) Well, Blacklight used my computer for this, and I think we’re about to run out of storage space again. Gonna have to cut this off.
[Blacklight]: But I still have to tell them about—
[Mr. C]: (offscreen) Uhh…
[Blacklight]: Shush. New Sonic game just dropped. I’ll talk to you when I’m done playing.
[Mr. C]: (offscreen) Well that looks…interesting… Anyways, I figured you’d be interested to hear that Team Rocket got fired or something. Not really sure how that works, but since you’ve been so invested in them…
[Blacklight]: Hmm… I’ll deal with them in due time… But the game comes first!
[Mr. C]: (offscreen) Well, at least he’s out of my hair for the day…
The Chaos Project: Sonic the Hedgehog 