[Blacklight]: Thank you, everyone, thank you. This truly has been a life-changing experience. But unfortunately, all good things must come to an end. And so, without further ado, let’s hear it, Shadow! What’s the final tally?
[Shadow]: There’s only one question here.
[Shadow]: Yes, as in, this is the only one.
[Blacklight]: No, no, that can’t be right! The website stats right here tell me that at least…uh…uh…twelve different people visited the site today!
[Shadow]: Huh. Twelve. That’s a lot more than the three I predicted.
[Blacklight]: Well why didn’t they ask us any questions!?
[Shadow]: Probably because most of them got here by accident…
[Blacklight]: Well…what’s the question, then?
[Shadow]: Let’s see here. Ninja100 asks…Shadow, how do you feel about your fan base? Do you like them, resent them, or what?
[Blacklight]: Are you kidding me!? Our only question is for Shadow!? Even the Team Rocket website gave me more attention!
[Shadow]: Well, I’ll just go ahead and answer, then. Personally, I don’t like to put people in boxes. Not the figurative kind, anyways.
[Blacklight]: Shadow…was that a joke?
[Shadow]: Don’t act so surprised. Anyways, just because a person calls themselves a “Shadow fan” doesn’t mean that they’re automatically cool or annoying. Of course, some people like me for the wrong reasons, as Blacklight has unfortunately already brought up. I have a special list for such people.
[Blacklight]: And since you so rudely failed to ask me, I’ll answer anyways. My fanbase is garbage, because they didn’t ask me any questions for the Q&A.
[Shadow]: Don’t you think that’s a bit presumptuous? I mean, maybe your fans just didn’t get here in time. This did all happen a bit suddenly.
[Blacklight]: Shadow, your optimistic attitude is starting to scare me.
[Shadow]: Well it doesn’t take much to do that.
[Eggman]: *clears throat*
[Blacklight]: Can I help you?
[Eggman]: We’re ready to answer our questions!
(Yeah, let’s hear ’em! I’m ready for anything!)
[Blacklight]: Sorry, guys. No questions. Show’s over.
[Shadow]: This is the moment everyone’s been waiting for. Surely you can do something while we’re all here.
[Blacklight]: Oh, right, I almost forgot about the backup plan! Everyone get ready, ’cause we’re about to start the real main event of the night!
(Well what is it!?)
[Blacklight]: It’s time for the big Blacklight Takeover Finale Special Guest Star Death Match!
[Eggman]: Death match?
[Blacklight]: Team Rocket couldn’t attend, but that still leaves us with a battle to the death between Shadow, Eggman, Bowser, and Movie Sonic!
(I’m ready! Bring it on, losers!)
[Eggman]: I’m not sure this is such a good idea…
[Shadow]: I don’t think we have the insurance to cover a death match.
[Mr. C]: (offscreen) We don’t have insurance.
[Blacklight]: Everyone take your places! This will be a true contest of— Wait, where’s Movie Sonic?
[Teen Sonic]: That’s him, Tom! The guy who threw me out a window!
[Tom Wachowski]: Freeze, GHPD! I’m placing you under arrest for aggravated assault!
[Blacklight]: (walking towards Tom) Please, I’m sure this is some sort of big misunder— *shot with tranquilizer dart* (losing consciousness) I… …plead the… …fourth Chaos Emerald… *collapses on floor*
[Tom Wachowski]: (cuffing Blacklight) You have the right to remain silent.
[Teen Sonic]: Critical enough for you?
(What exactly is happening here?)
[Teen Sonic]: Now let’s blow this popsicle stand and go home, eh, Tom?
*Sonic and Tom exit, carrying Blacklight with them*
[Shadow]: I…think the show just ended.
(Welp, guess I’m going home then. What a waste of time.) *exits*
[Eggman]: Will you be going home as well, Shadow?
[Shadow]: No…someone needs to go bail him out of jail.
[Eggman]: For someone who can’t even tolerate him, you sure are a good friend to him.
[Shadow]: One day, he’ll realize that his rash actions have consequences. But apparently, not today.
[Eggman]: You know, this whole “war-free zone” thing was actually pretty fun. We should do this again sometime. *pats Shadow on the back*
[Shadow]: If you don’t get out of here before the cameras cut, the death match might be back on.
[Eggman]: (sweating) Understood, leaving now. *exits*
[Shadow]: (to camera) And for all twelve of you who came to watch…thank you. The thought of making even one person laugh…I’m sure that made this all worth it for him. And for me. (looking up) Chaos Control!
[Mr. C]: (offscreen) I guess I’ll clean this all up myself, then…